The shallowest cut
by cein
Summary: Sometimes the deepest cut isn't the one which causes most pain. A little Alice & Matthew vignette


Title: The shallowest cut  
Fandom: The Doctor Blake Mysteries  
Author: Ceindreadh  
Type of Story: one-shot  
Characters: Matthew Lawson, Alice Harvey  
Rating: 15  
Spoilers: Up to and including the telemovie  
Summary: Sometimes the deepest cut isn't the one which causes most pain.  
Word count: ~ 1,000  
Disclaimer. I don't own the characters, I'm only borrowing them, and no copyright infringement is intended.

* * *

Alice heard a yelp of pain followed by some not entirely muted curses as she made her way into the main office at the police station.

Matthew Lawson, the only occupant, was sitting at his desk, sucking at a finger on his right hand and swearing softly.

"Is everything all right?" asked Alice, as she approached Matthew's desk.

Matthew started as the sound of her voice and flushed slightly. "Sorry Alice," he said, a little shamefacedly. "Didn't think there was anybody in earshot."

"That was most obvious," said Alice. "What happened, is it a splinter?"

"Not a splinter," said Matthew, he waved his hand, "Cut myself on the edge of that file there." He indicated the carboard folder on the desk in front of him, and then looked at his finger, "Damn, it's still bleeding."

"Let me take a look at it," said Alice, as she pulled up a chair beside him.

"It's nothing, it'll be fine," said Matthew.  
"Remind me again which of us has had the most medical training?" said Alice, "Let me see." Her tone brooked no resistance.

Matthew held her gaze for a few seconds before giving her his hand. Alice held it under the light and could see that the cut was shallow, but deep enough to bleed. "Well you shouldn't need stitches," she said, airily, "Just make sure it gets cleaned thoroughly. It should stop bleeding momentarily." She applied a bit of pressure to the wound and Matthew pulled his hand away, barely stifling another curse.  
"That hurt!" he said, somewhat indignantly.

Alice looked at him in some surprize, "You had your femur reset without the benefit of anaesthesia, and you think that a paper cut is painful?"  
"Carboard, not paper," snapped Matthew, "And by all accounts I screamed bloody murder at the time when it was happening as well." He looked as if he was going to say something else but then stopped.

"Do you remember much about that time," asked Alice, gently. All her instincts were telling her to tread carefully. Matthew Lawson, her friend, her partner in so many things was possibly the most circumspect person she'd ever met, herself included. She'd overheard more than one person speculating about the nature of their relationship, wondering if they just sat in silence when they weren't discussing police matters. Oh, how little those people knew of what went on between them behind closed doors. But even with the level of both personal and professional intimacy that they had reached at this point, there were still things, not exactly secrets, but confidences which had yet to be shared, but which would be when the time was right. Alice had a feeling that this was the right time, but that she needed to ask the right questions.

Matthew shrugged, "Bits and pieces mostly. I remember…" he swallowed hard, "I remember seeing the car coming straight at me…that bastard Jones behind the wheel. Charlie screaming for help. I remember Mattie O'Brien holding my hand while they cut away my clothes…" He hesitated for a few seconds, before continuing, "And I remember Lucien arguing with that Doctor about amputation."

Alice reached out and put her hand on Matthew's, which were now clenched into fists. He laughed hollowly, "But most of all…I remember the pain…it felt like my leg had already been ripped off…I thought…I was sure I was gonna die." He glanced up to see Alice's sympathetic gaze and then looked away. Clearing his throat, he added, with deliberate casualness, "Of course there were times afterwards when I wished I had." He heard Alice's sharp intake of breath.  
"I…didn't know that," said Alice.  
Matthew shrugged, "I wasn't in a great place after…after that Doctor Masterson told me I'd never walk unassisted again. I knew that was it for me and the police force. Being stuck in that hospital bed…all I could think was that my life might as well be over, because for as far back as I could remember, I'd wanted to be a copper." His hands relaxed slightly, and he clasped Alice's hand in his as he continued, "As soon I was fit to travel, they shipped me off to my sister in Melbourne. And let me tell you, Vera wasn't about to let me wallow in self-pity for very long. She got me started on a good physio regime as soon as I was able. Made sure that I didn't shirk my exercises…or push myself too hard. She convinced me not to take medical retirement until I'd exhausted every possibility of staying with the force. Made me realise that I could still help people, even if I was stuck behind a desk. And that meant that I was in the right place at the right time when they needed somebody to handle Ballarat again."

Matthew absently traced a lazy circle on the back of Alice's hand and he smiled as he looked back at her. "Plenty of times before then, I wished that Lucien hadn't been able to save my leg because I figured that getting used to a wooden one couldn't have been any more difficult. But Vera kept me going. That's where Rose gets her doggedness from."  
"It's clearly a family trait," said Alice, putting her other hand on top of Matthew's.  
"It's funny when you think of it," said Matthew, "My old man's gambling habit, messed up my life pretty badly growing up. Forty years on and Frank Carlyle's gambling habit helped fix things for me."

Alice knew that this would be a confidence to be shared another time. Reluctantly she pulled her hands away, twisting Matthew's right hand so she could see the cut. "It's stopped bleeding," she said. "I can clean it for you and we can go home." She stood, keeping his hand in hers. "Shall we?"  
Matthew looked at the file and then at Alice. He'd been re-reading through his report, but there wasn't really anything he could do to add to the file until morning. Resolutely he closed the file and stood up.  
In a smooth move, borne out of long experience, Alice passed him his cane, and Matthew put his free arm around her shoulders. "Let's go home."

The end


End file.
